Playstation 4 #2: Burly Men at Sea

Developer: Brain&Brain

Publisher: Brain&Brain

Release Date: 9-29-16

 

I am once again baffled by one of my game reviews. I am profiling a game that despite feeling almost completely pointless to me has gotten very good reviews. Perhaps you readers can enlighten me on why this game struck such a chord with critics. It feels like another platinum trophy cash grab to me. That’s why I am writing about it now right after My Name is Mayo. However, it actually appeared on mobile devices before it made its way to Playstation 4. It’s still a very easy platinum however. It only takes about an hour and a half even though you have to finish the game twelve times to get it. It’s a game that only takes about ten minutes to beat once and additional playthroughs don’t add that much to the experience. 

And then one brother proclaimed "Hey look, fish"

 

It’s a game with a real identity crisis. It doesn’t know whether it wants to be an adventure game without the adventure, a visual novel without the novel, or a walking simulator without the walking. You play as three men who have beards. There was a time a few years ago where just facial hair in general was supposed to be funny. No punchline necessary. So theses three men who hilariously have beards set off on a journey where each section is going to offer them three choices. It does a bit like this: Once choice might be they decide to take a boat than one of the men says “Hey look we’re in a boat.” The next time through you might chose to ride in barrels instead. One of the men then says “Hey look we’re in barrels.” Then a giant octopus comes and one of the men says “Hey look it’s a giant octopus.” I can tell that they want this to be a funny light adventure game, but it’s hard to feel much immersion when the dialogue is so bland. Some of the reviews called is laugh out loud funny, but I hardly even remember chuckling. Then the game starts over so you can do it all again and find out what happens when you take the raft instead.

And then one brother proclaimed "Hey look, water"

 

Now there is a bit more interaction than what I have talked about so far, but it’s really nothing of consequence. It’s not like anything is going to lead to death. There aren’t any real puzzles to solve. Sometimes the object that needs to be interacted with will be a little bit obscure but that’s as hard as it gets. Now I get that it’s good for a game to have an atmosphere to it, but I really don’t like the current trend of games that have an interesting atmosphere with no gameplay whatsoever. Sure it has a nice nautical theme, but it’s not the only game with one and just about any other game that takes place at sea has actually gameplay. The dialogue might save a game like this, but as I already said the dialogue is quite bland. And yet Time Magazine of all things gave this game a perfect score. It’s hardly even a game.

 

Yeah this game is going low on my list. I just wish it lived up to my initial expectation. Reading the name made me think it was going to be a game about gay pirates. Now that’s a game I would like to play. The world could use more inclusive adventure games. Unfortunately it’s another bit of nothing that fooled the gaming press simply by looking different than a normal game. This was one of the PS Plus games a while back so if you have it on your backlog play it for the platinum. If not than it is a game I seriously can’t recommend. That gives the Playstation 4 a very hard 0/2 for quality. I need to play something good next time I encounter the console.

 

1. Super Mario Odyssey

2. Galaga

3. Donkey Kong

4. Exodus: Ultima III

5. Pac-Mania

6. Wrecking Crew

7. Super Pac-Man

8. Pac-Man

9. Excitebike

10. Arc the Lad

11. Clu Clu Land

12. Artifact Adventure Gaiden DX

13. Mickey’s Racing Adventure

14. Metro-Cross

15. Ice Climber

16. Gaplus

17. Dragon Spirit

18. Pinball (NES)

19. Walt Disney World Quest: Magical Racing Tour (GBC)

20. Red Sea Crossing

21. Baraduke

22. Gamma-Attack

23. The Legend of “Valkyrie”

24. Galaxian

25. Evoland

26. Defunct

27. Gyruss (2600)

28. Looney Tunes Racing

29. Squidlit

30. Baseball

31. Birthday Mania

32. Bad Street Brawler

33. Burly Men at Sea

34. My Name is Mayo